This past spring break, my friends and I hit the road on a girls trip to Disney. Our first day at Magic Kingdom went off without a hitch. The weather was tepid and lovely, and the sky shone bright and clear. When the sun set, we filed down through Main Street and waited with bated breath as Cinderella’s Castle came to life. Packed like sardines in between strollers and extended families, the fireworks lit up the sky and everything felt magical.
The next morning, that light, bubbly feeling vanished when I swiped open my weather app. The temperature had spiked fifteen degrees overnight. I tugged on my biker shorts and stepped in front of the mirror. My face fell. I hated how I looked–all sucked in, round, and protruding. All of the girls sat waiting in the living room, clad in matching biker shorts.
“I don’t know. This outfit is not very flattering on me,” I said, shimmying and picking at the spandex. My friend shook her head.
“Alex,” she said, “‘flattering’ is just a another word for ‘skinny.’”
It was like a lightbulb went off in some dark, shameful dressing room in my mind. Past conversations with friends and sales people surfaced in a blur. “Those pants look so flattering on you. That dress does wonders for your curves. You look great in high-rise jeans.” I’d once gushed over these comments, congratulating myself on a job well done.
“‘Flattering’ is just another word for ‘skinny.’” I couldn’t get it out of my head. I still can’t.
We’re living in a burgeoning age of body-positivity, and yet, I’ve never been more unsatisfied with my body. So, how can this be?
Let’s get one thing straight. Body positivity is not mutually exclusive to body shaming. While brands like Aerie have transformed into inclusive, body positive platforms, body ideals have not been wiped clean from the fashion industry, only shifted. Now, women are allowed to be curvier, but only if they fit into an hourglass mold. If you’re more pear-shaped like me, that’s great! Just make sure to suck in that tummy with high-waisted jeans. The fact is, you may not love how you look, but society will.
Dressing for your body type isn’t just restrictive – it’s damaging to those who don’t fit in the box. By stating that certain physiques are best suited to a particular cut or color implies that any deviation from these styles would deem the forms unattractive. With so many unique physicalities, those who are unable to conform to any pre-established body types are left to slip through the cracks.
What has been portrayed as an uplifting tool for women persists as a veiled form of female degradation, promoting shame and self-loathing in women of all shapes and sizes. Human bodies don’t fit a mold, so how should every person meet the requirements of an established body type? They can’t. My solution: BREAK THE BOX.
Don’t dress for what society, or your friends, or your partner thinks is flattering. Curate a wardrobe that makes you feel your most comfortable and confident. Think about what colors and styles resonate with you. Are you a cottage-core girly? Do you thrive in muted tones? Let yourself run wild. Wear a different style of pants or a different cut top everyday until you’ve determined your unique brand of awesome. Whether you choose to sport your mom’s vintage Levi’s or wide leg trousers, wear what makes you feel like a badass.
Words by Alex Armbruster.
Graphic by Ashlyn Warner.