Ok, I have to admit something; I am very bad when it comes to self-care. From the outside most people who know me or at least know of me assume I have a great self-care routine. I love and work in beauty and wellness, and my Instagram is often plastered with quotes about being nice to yourself and giving yourself time for self-care. However, self-care and I often don’t work out well.
Why is this? I am just a tad bit of a perfectionist. Ok, that was a white lie. I am a giant perfectionist. My perfectionism extends itself to self-care. I have often felt like I do not have a lot of time, so the time I spend on myself should be so well thought out, and the Pinterest perfect version of self-care I often imagine. When I do find time, I could be taking care of myself. I end up just sitting and spiraling, thinking about all the things I should do but don’t know how to or don’t know what to do or end up feeling like other people do self-care better than me.
Self-care should not be a competition or something that makes you feel inadequate. It should be anything that fills you up and makes you feel happy and healthy. I decided to write this because I feel like I am most likely not the only person who feels this way. If you also feel like you are too much of a perfectionist to do self-care, you are welcome here!
You may be asking, “Ok, Annika, we get it, but what do we do?” That is a great question, my friend. I personally am not an expert, so I will impart some advice from my amazing therapist (yes, I have one and recommend it for most people). We will call her Teri. I have addressed Teri how I never feel like I can follow through with self-care, so I got a few tips from Teri on making self-care more manageable.
Make a list of everything you like to do in your phone notes. For me, this could be yoga, meditation, watching Gilmore Girls, taking a walk, crocheting, etc., and referring to this list whenever you are unsure of what to do. This way, you are not spinning when you are trying to come up with self-care ideas at the moment. Teri also recommended creating a special self-care box. In this box, you put your favorite face mask, jewelry-making items, yarn for crochet, tea bags, etc. This can be the box you go to and grab anything from it and do whatever you hold. You could purposefully look and grab a specific thing or use it as a grab bag/box, and if you pull out a paintbrush, you “have to” paint. These are nice ways to easily remember your favorite self-care ideas, especially when you are ready to have some downtime.
Remember, self-care should not be about aesthetics or their appeal. But instead about what brings you peace and happiness. It is ok and normal not to be perfect. We shouldn’t try to live up to what we think are perfect versions of wellness. In reality, nothing is perfect, and everything we do takes practice. Sometimes we forget that we need to practice and put time into our wellness and self-care routine. I have not found mine yet, but every time I take a step forward in my wellness journey, I feel accomplished and excited for what’s next. Unwind, relax, take a deep breath, and remember you are killing the game!
Words and graphics by Annika Petersen.